The Customary Greek Wedding Ceremony
The Ceremony is comprised of two parts – the Betrothal Service, and the Crowning Service.
The Greek Orthodox Church describes marriage as a holy union whereby a man and woman struggle together toward sanctification and eternal life within the community of faithful. The symbolism, prayers and rituals that unfold during the Betrothal Service serve to reinforce, communicate and celebrate this central meaning of marriage.
The Betrothal Service
The first part of the service is referred to as the Betrothal Service. It is comprised of five parts.
1) Doxology
“Blessed be our God both now and ever and unto the ages of ages.” Many Orthodox prayer services begin with this doxology. This is a form of prayer. As you may have already noticed, this prayer does not request anything from God. It simply calls both partners – together with all who are in attendance - to acknowledge God.
2) Opening Petitions
A petition is another form of prayer. This set of petitions begins with some general requests asking God to bless those in attendance with peace and salvation. After these opening petitions, it quickly narrows its focus and concerns itself with the couple who are pledging themselves to one another. The prayers will ask God to bless the couple with divine peace, love, harmony and oneness of mind. God is also asked to promote fidelity and mutual trust within their lives across the life cycle.
3) Two Short Prayers
The priest will subsequently read two short prayers. They remind the couple that God’s love has brought them together, and will sustain them in “peace and oneness of mind” across the marital life cycle. They also remind the couple that they are standing before God, family and the Church pledging to enter into an “indissoluble bond of love.”
4) The Exchange of Rings
The priest will stand before the couple and bless them in the sign of the cross with their wedding rings. Beginning with the groom and then the bride, he will prayerfully intone the following statement: “The servant of God ______, is betrothed to the servant of God ______, in the name of the Father, Son and holy Spirit.” This will be done three times. Once this step is complete, the priest will begin with the bride, prayerfully repeating the same pattern.
From an Orthodox perspective, this action serves to seal the couple’s commitment. No vows are requested or required. The couple’s silent participation in this rite presupposes their commitment, and from an Orthodox perspective is a more than sufficient witness of their dedication to one another. Moreover, the rings they will wear on their fingers henceforth will serve as a silent reminder of this commitment.
5) The Closing Prayer
The final prayer serves to provide closure by recapping some of the significant underlying meaning of the rings which have served to seal their commitment to one another. This prayer also functions to provide a convenient transition into the second half of the service. One of the final phrases alludes to the couple’s life together as husband and wife: “and may your angel go before them all the days of their life, for you are he that blesses and sanctifies all things.”
The Crowning Service
This service is comprised of eleven parts.
1) Psalm 127/128
This psalm reminds couples that our happiness, prosperity and the children that come into our lives are ultimately blessings from God, and not exclusively the result of our choices and decisions.
2) Doxology
“Blessed is the Kingdom of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto the ages of ages.” This prayer introduces the Crowning Service. It is Trinitarian in form (repeated three times), as is the case with the entire Sacrament.
3) The Wedding Candles
The priest will present the Wedding Candles to both partners, and instruct them to hold them in their right hands. The candle flame symbolizes divine light that has come into the world through Christ. As the couple receive the candles, through this ritual they are celebrating the light of Christ that has come into the world to illumine their lives as individuals, as well as the mutual joining together of their lives as a couple in Christ.
4) Etitions
After some introductory petitions of a general nature, a series of requests are made on behalf of both partners. The first of these petitions will include both individuals’ names to emphasize the personal characteristic of the sacrament – This petition begins, “For the servants of God _____ and ______....” It also reminds us that God knows us and loves us personally, and not simply as part of a vast ocean of humanity.
5) Three Prayers
Along with the other prayers in this service, the next three prayers tell a story. With the help of a litany of Old Testament images, metaphors and references, the story they describe involves a loving, caring God who has instituted marriage to preserve and protect humankind across time. They also recount how marriage affords us the opportunity to become a part of something more than ourselves. From this God-given institution, a new relationship is formed, and from this willful joining together, two lives are prayerfully bond together, families emerge, and life continues. The priest will then join their right hands together, and through this invocation and ritual, another couple is brought into this story - with the Church’s hope and prayer that they will make this story an integral part of the story they will coauthor together into the future.
6) Crowning
After the couple’s hands are joined together, the priest will bless their wedding crowns, and recite the following statement three separate times in front of the couple: “The servant of God _____ is crowned for the servant of God ______, in the name of the Father, and the Son and the holy Spirit.” Upon completion, he will reverse the process, beginning with the bride while repeating the same words. The priest will then place the crowns on both partner’s heads, and chant “O, Lord our God, crown them with glory and honor.” The sponsor will then exchange the crowns three times, and place them back on each partner’s head. This is an ancient ritual, perhaps reaching back to the 2nd or 3rd century.
7) Scripture Readings
Most services in the Orthodox Church contain Scripture readings. The Orthodox Church believes that Holy Scripture is the Holy Word of God, and contains God’s revealed truth and wisdom. In the case of the Sacrament of Marriage, the lessons selected and read are foundational to the Orthodox Church’s understanding of marriage. They encapsulate much of what the Orthodox Church believes about marriage, and reinforce the message behind the prayers and hymns of this service.
8) The Lord’s Prayer
After a few more petitions and prayers are recited, a recitation of the Lord’s Prayer takes place. This is a familiar prayer that most Christians have committed to memory.
9) The Common Cup
The priest will then ask God to bless a cup that contains wine. This cup is generally called the Common Cup. He will then offer the cup to each partner, beginning with the groom. Each partner will drink from the cup three times. Briefly, the wine in this cup symbolizes the bitter and sweet moments of married life that both partners will share in together.
10) Procession
After the couple drink from the Common Cup, the priest, couple and sponsor will walk around the table. In earlier times, this procession took place from the church to the couple’s home. Today it takes place round the table in the center that is located in front of the Icon Screen. Holding the Gospels in his right hand, the priest will guide everyone around the table three times while three hymns are chanted. As the couple follows the priest, their journey together begins.
11) Final Exhortation
Two short congratulatory prayers are read immediately following the procession. The first relates to the groom, and the second to the bride. The crowns are also removed at this point, and the dismissal follows.
